Blaming Yourself

Many men and women are truly afraid to be themselves in a relationship. Sometimes it's hard to share who you really are with the people you love because you're afraid of rejection or judgment. A friend of mine was recently cheated on. He is a really sweet guy but he's meddled in the wrong crowd and has put himself in really sticky situations. The girl he loved had only been his girlfriend for 8 months, but he thought the world of her. Now that she has cheated, he has run through so many possible reasons why she could have done something this terrible to him. He acquired an injury which has taken many months for him to recover from.... he is still in the hospital, unable to walk and considers this a reason why she might have cheated on him with her ex-boyfriend. He constantly spends his days in a hospital bed, bored out of his mind, but she would usually join him and keep him company. Now that she has cheated, I cannot imagine how boring it must be to spend your days in a hospital bed, unable to go anywhere or do anything fun... but to also be in there, with your thoughts, and knowing how the one you loved cheated on you is probably one of the worst things to endure. The physical strain that cheating puts on a lover is unimaginable. Knowing the one you loved wasn't as faithful as you were must be really tough. Like in my previous post, Love or Lust, when someone cheats on you, it's not your fault.... you didn't single handedly push them into the arms of another, they cheated because they weren't the one you thought they were, and as hurtful and as sad as that may feel, you deserve better. When the healing process is over and you're truly past this ultimatum, look back with a positive mind.... not a negative one. Don't regret what happened... be thankful you found out when you did instead of years down the road.... My advice to my friend is when something this sad happens to you, don't blame yourself... don't find any possible reason why the person you loved could have done this to you.... don't blame your own physical set back, or appearance, or who you are mentally... don't blame yourself. You are perfectly fine. It's the person that cheated on you who should be feeling like shit and blaming themselves. Not you. And to my readers going through the same situation... you deserve so much better... don't get  back with that person if your reasoning is because you're afraid to be alone or because you don't think you can find better.... You can get whoever you want. You just have to think positively and be confident in yourself. Always remember, there's only one you in the world... don't let yourself go to waste.

-RG